Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Taylor Swift Speaks the Truth

I feel like this song (and the video too) pretty much defines my life for the past eight years. In two different ways. And no, not about a specific person. Just in general.

1) I really like this song because it talks a lot about being normal instead of being super preppy popular. It's really easy to be invisible when you're not a smokin hot model. And sometimes people don't see how cool you really are because of how hot you're not.

I wear t-shirts, sneakers, and wouldn't be caught dead cheerleading, especially as the captain. That girl is seriously me. There are many, many times in my life when all I want to do is shout "Don't you get it! I'm a person too! I exist!"

This song does a fantastic job of vocalizing that. Every time I listen to it I think "welcome to my life".

Me =>

2) Sadly, it also does a fair job at communicating that people will never get it. And that is the most frustrating part. The part in which I find even more of a connection with my life. Your friends always say things like "Well, they just don't know you. I do, and I know you're awesome." Yeah, that was a nice thing to say, and all, but it doesn't actually make the situation any different.

Because no matter how true it is that "it's the inside that counts", people just don't get to know the inside if they stay away from you because of the outside.

No matter how un-shallow a person is, they will never like you for you if they don't know what "you" consists of. And they won't know that unless they have some kind of introduction to a place where they can learn who you are. Being hot is that introduction for most people.

Even in the video, the guy doesn't notice her notice her until she gets all dolled up with the hair and the makeup and looks just like the other girl on the outside. Then he finally sits up and realizes what a moron he was.

<= Not Me

It sounds like I'm being depressingly negative. I don't mean to be all woe is me. It's just sad that it has to be that way. But really, how else is it going to be? As long as people live in this world, they will never be blind to looks. And as long as they're never blind to looks, the people with all their 'cool' on the inside will always be invisible.

And I guess I'm going to stay that way, because honestly, every time I have gotten "dolled up" to whatever extent, even including make up and hair, I really kinda hate it. Not in terms of the work and uncomfortable-ness, which I do hate, but I just don't like myself when I look that way.

Sometimes I look in the mirror and I say "ugh. Gross" but when I look like that, I look in the mirror and say "Uh... creepy? Weird? Not okay on any planet." etc. Don't ask me to explain it, but I just look friggin ugly with straightened hair and oodles of eye shadow. At least I do to me.

It's a catch-22. Fancy up so the rest of the shallow world will notice me while hating myself as I do it? Or like myself the way I am and ignore the fact that the world will never care?

So yeah, that's my life.

1 comment:

Jennifer said...

first of all, you are never "friggin ugly" especially when you get "dolled up."

second of all, i love you.